Fire & Ice: Welcome to Smallville #5 review

It’s another busy day in Smallville. Bea and Tora’s beauty parlour is hit by arson, supposedly friendly supervillains decide to rob the town blind, a new friend turns out to be an old enemy and the cannibal plague continues.

Who started the blaze isn’t obvious, but Bea’s employee Tam reckons it’s her supervillain crush Honey, who’s abandoned her the morning after the night before.

Meanwhile the bad guys Bea has been trying to rehabilate have had enough of the straight and narrow.

And Ice reveals the source of the craze for eating human flesh that’s been sweeping Smallville.

While Ice-obsessed waitress Rocky proves to be possessed.

And then there’s the soap. Lots and lots of soap, as Rocky’s brother moons over Bea, Tam gives Bea life advice and ape woman Linka admits she’s terribly jealous of big brother Grodd.

But it’s the two villains that have my attention. While Rocky looks like she’s gone all Swamp Thing, a smalltown Poison Ivy, she’s actually the avatar of Kooey Kooey Kooey. Yep, the island Blue Beetle and Booster Gold tried to make into Club JLI years ago is angry. I’m not sure its plan makes sense

An island reborn in the landlocked Midwest?

Ah well, maybe Fire and Ice will point the problem out in next issue’s finale. For now, I’m glad to report writer Joanne Starer gets this mini-series back on track after last issue’s disappointing and annoying chapter. Fire finally seems to be taking things seriously, Ice has stopped being dazzled by Rocky’s frantic friendliness, Martha Kent has a better role than drag show cheerleader…

I’m glad Charlie – Rocky’s bar-owning brother – is realising Fire isn’t the settling down kind, but I do feel sorry for Tam, who seems to have imprinted on bad girl Honey and is similarly finding she’s no nearer to The One.

While the soapy elements with the Smallville townsfolk take space away from our headline act, it’s arguable that it’s fair enough as they’re in the title too – Welcome to Smallville. God knows what their lives will be like after next issue, what with DC’s version of Krakoa on the loose and a cannibal plague spreader out for Ice’s (cold) blood. Starer is really going to have to mention that Superman is busy on the proverbial mission in another galaxy if he’s not to swoop in and help with clean up, because there’s a lot going on.

I don’t expect Clark to take over next issue, Starer is smart enough to see Tora and Bea must clean up their own mess. Let’s see the baddies beaten, the D-list villains kicked out of town and poor old Beefeater returned to life (I don’t care how, a classic JLI character is not to be killed off panel).

Natacha Bustos again provides lively soft-edged artwork, with everyone having a distinctive look. The general cuteness means that when the Rocky reveal comes it’s weirdly disturbing. I continue to enjoy the visuals involving the rubbishy bad guys, especially the fella with brains in his bottom. And our heroines look great.

Tamra Bonvillain brings the countrified colours and Ariana Maher the lovely letters, while Terry Dodson and Rachel Dodson supply my favourite cover of the run, a great take on a classic theme.

Next time, Beefeater returns and kicks all the butt (especially if there’s a brain or two in there). Hey, I can dream…